The yarn sits in a jumble by my feet. Ivory yarn that was once a scarf for my sister-in-law. I’ve started to unravel it to turn it into something else.
You see, she never really got a chance to wear it – she died the winter after I made it for her.
And now, 4 years later, I’m taking apart the gift I once stitched and can’t help compare it to the unraveling of life as we once knew. The unraveling of familial relationships – relationships that will never be the same.
And I’ve felt the pulling and the yanking as the stitches have been undone. I’ve even felt the severing as the knots have been cut away.
I’ve been living with this process for years now and I’m reaping the fallout. The escape into mind-numbing pursuits, pushing sleep away, trying to be all, and carrying the weight of family strain. All the stitches being yanked and undone.
As I hold the yarn, I’m reliving the last few years, all the pain and weight felt again.
But I know that the pulling of the yarn has a greater purpose than just a meaningless pile on the floor. Soon, I’ll gather it up and roll it into a skein. Once that’s done the stitches will be cast on and something beautiful, useful, will begin to take shape.
So, I beg the Father, do this in the unraveled mess of my heart and life.
Please, to the One who makes all things new, take my life and knit something beautiful.
With hope, and a glimmer of anticipation, I take up the needles and will turn a dead woman’s yarn into something useful again.
It amazing how the Lord provides just what you need. It 11 o’clock at night here in Germany. It been a very hard week and I needed some encouragement. Thanking the Lord for your words.
Dear Rebecca,
I’m so thankful that the Lord could use this to encourage you. Thank you for reading! And, if there is anything specific that I can pray about for you, just let me know. I look at my readership as family and I love praying for people 🙂 Hope you have a wonderful weekend!
That’s beautiful heartfelt and meaning in a world that unravels for all of us. I often wonder why we would bring children into the world so broken and increasingly dangerous. I know that dreams will crumble, the plans will fail, and goals won’t be obtained. The truth is that it is OUR dreams that crumble, and OUR plans that fail and OUR goals we don’t obtain. God’s thoughts aren’t our thought and His ways aren’t ours (Isaiah 55:8-9). His plan may be to take me through the fire or across pleasant pastures through joyous victory or devasting defeat. Whether bitter water i drink or aboundless feasting I partake I know that my Father is using the pain of my heart or jubilant spirit to show me His almighty power. Because my own raveledness gives Him more yarn to make into something useable for His service and His perfect me. Heaven will present me a completed work righteous and at utter peace.
Thank you for your comment, Leah. It made me think again about God’s Sovereignty and how everything is for the glory of the Father.
I just hopped over to connect with you my friend – and this is good writing. I feel the loss and I feel your struggle over trying to keep something very broken together. And you know what – it is okay that you can’t fix the brokenness – because only a Savior offering grace can and does,\.
Love you girl…
Sandra
Thank you, Sandra! I’m so glad to have you visit – I miss our talks! I hope that you’re doing well. I think of you often.
love,
Danielle