Lust – Not Just a Man’s Problem

The other day while I was sweeping (I have a compulsive sweeping disorder), my mind wandered to the amount of television I used to watch compared to now. The shows have been whittled down to 2 mainly because of the time available. But as I cataloged the names I settled on one in particular and immediately thought of one of the attractive male characters. Time wasn’t  a factor where this show was concerned. The issue was that I was watching for him and raising an eyebrow when he was shirtless. When I realized what was happening and the ‘why’ behind viewing that program – I knew it had to go.


 So many times we talk about men and their lustful bent. But I don’t recall ever hearing us women admonished about what we put in front of our eyes.

 It isn’t wrong to appreciate the male form. There are many of us who have husbands who would LOVE it if we told them how much we appreciated their form. The trouble comes, the sin comes, when we start to admire and lust after those men who aren’t our own.

 I know that this is a difficult topic. In the church environment that I grew up in “a good Christian lady” didn’t have those types of thoughts.

But we live in a culture that encourages us to turn every person we meet into a means of self-gratification and we have to stand firm.

God had called us from a life of sin to a life of true holiness. He gives us the strength to turn from our lust and live a life of righteousness.

This is a subject that has been on my heart for a long time because, I am ashamed to admit, has been a struggle since my teenage years. But I write this to encourage you. We all struggle with something. Something that rears its ugly head just when we think we’ve gotten it beat and whispers that we’ve failed again. We will fail, but because of God’s amazing grace, He sees Christ’s righteousness and not our sin.

Don’t give up sisters.

Why Your Weirdness is Wonderful, Book Review

Quirks. We all have them. Some of us like to be alone. Some of us like the smell of cap guns. Others love being in the limelight. Sometimes these can be seen as a blessing but often times we see them as more of a burden. And we desperately try to hide them – acting like something we aren’t.


Laurie Wallin has recently published a book titled “Why Your Weirdness is Wonderful” and I have had the privilege to be on her launch team. Let me just say, this book is awesome!  Practically speaking, this book is divided up into several parts made up of relatively short chapters, that take you deeper into discovering how your quirks can make up a beautiful picture instead of an awful mess.

First, Laurie takes you through listing your quirks and seeing how these might actually be strengths instead of weaknesses. She helps you see through each chapter how your quirks, in reality your strengths, can work together to accomplish what God has planned for you.

    My quirks, preferences, strengths and challenges, it became clear, had all been one huge becoming.      Each revealed parts of God’s design in me―for me―and it all mattered.                                                            Just as every part matters in yours. – Laurie Wallin

Let that sink in. Every. Part. Matters. That was astounding to me and I hope that as you read this book it will be astounding to you as well.

She also helps you to see what she calls the “life” side and “dark” sides of our quirks. In one of her interview questions, Laurie explains it in the following way.

 In the book you talk about the dark sides and positive sides of our quirks. Could you give a few examples for readers?
As a Star Wars fan, I’ve always related to the whole Dark Side, Light Side (or, as I call it in the book, Life Side) idea. God invests tendencies in us, and we either love Him and others with them (reveal their Life Sides) or we live from fear (Dark Sides). The most common struggle strengths I hear about from people are tendencies to overthink things, be too sensitive, worry too much, argue too much, or be controlling. There are a lot of possible strengths hiding in these Dark Sides, and maybe they come from different strengths in different situations. For example, overthinking can be the Dark Side of being analytical, an achiever, someone who is contextual and sees connections between anything done or said now, and what it will effect. Being overly sensitive can be the Dark Side of empathetic, compassionate, or spiritually discerning individuals. Worrying too much is the fear-driven Dark Side of many prayer warriors I know. It’s not an exact science, but the important thing is to allow the question—to stop fighting who we are long enough to let God show us what is possible in us right then.

I don’t’ want to give the whole book away, so I’ll leave it at that. I do want to say though, that if this is something that you’ve struggled with, wondering where all those idiosyncrasies fit in, well, this book will definitely help. It certainly gave this Weirdo the confidence to live what God has called me to do, and I know Laurie’s words can do the same for you.

To connect with Laurie visit

To order Laurie’s book, “Why Your Weirdness is Wonderful” visit Amazon, Barnes and Noble, or CBD.



Actively Waiting

This post was written last spring but is still highly applicable. We are always waiting on something, but it is what we do while we wait that counts. I hope that this is an encouragement to you.

Recently I read an article by Paul Tripp titled “God’s Will for Your Wait”. The title grabbed my attention because as of late I’ve felt like I’ve been in a holding pattern, waiting for God to give some direction.

For 3 years now I’ve been a consultant with a company called Blessings Unlimited. It’s had its ups and downs like any business venture will, but for the most part I knew where I was headed with it, or at least where I wanted it to go. Lately, I haven’t been feeling this so much. My home life responsibilities are ever growing what with trying to perfect the art of homemaking, figuring out what life looks like for our family, and now the venture of homeschooling a 1st grader and a kindergartner. Throw in a preschooler and toddler and this mama is spinning.

I had been fretting, constantly asking God what He wanted me to do. I found myself depressed and confused. I would often check FB to see what was happening on my team’s page, who was going to national conference and wondering how I could get there too. I was an awful, depressed, unproductive, mess.

After reading Paul Tripp’s message, God convicted me of what I was doing – accomplishing nothing, missing the life that I was leading right now, and making my family miserable in the process. One of the reflection questions that he gives at the end of his article is

“Has the way you wait enabled you to reach out and minister to others better? Or has it simply drawn you deeply into the claustrophobic drama of your own waiting?”

When I read this, I had to stop and seriously evaluate these last several weeks because that sounded just like what I was experiencing and it wasn’t good.

So, I’ve made a decision, with God’s grace, of course. I’m not going to passively wait and see what happens, letting life pass me by. God may not have a place for me anymore at Blessings Unlimited, but that doesn’t mean that life is over. There are so many projects and interests that I’ve let go by the wayside because I’ve been waiting on this one thing.

So, I’m going to pick up my copy of ‘One Thousand Gifts’ and finish it this summer. I’m going to finish the dresser I started to paint, start this blog that I’ve been fantasizing about, finish my jewelry holder …. well, you get the picture. I’m going to start reveling in life instead of self-pity, ’cause no one wants to come to that party.




Love Mercy

I’ve never stepped foot in Africa. I’ve read books, seen pictures, heard stories of others’ adventures, but have always stayed here. Though for some reason, a God reason, a piece of  my heart is with some girls and their babies in Nairobi, Kenya.


These girls have outgrown their home at Rehema House (Rehema is the Swahili word for Mercy). This place gives these girls, who have no other option but poverty, a place to birth their babies and live life. The program includes counseling, nutrition, education, job skills, spiritual guidance, and life skills. Prenatal care is given prior to birth and after care is given to these mothers and their little ones.

These are the statistics that are a reality for these girls:

  • Annually, 21,000 women are hospitalized from having an illegal, unsafe abortion in Kenya. (Center for Reproductive Rights)
  • Abortion is a volatile topic in Kenya.
  • 13,000 Kenyan girls are kicked out of school for being pregnant. (Center for Reproductive Rights)
  • 25% of pregnant women in Kenya are HIV positive (ObGyn in Kenya)
  • Every 30 minutes, a woman is raped in Kenya. (Nairobi Women’s Hospital)
  • Mothers often force their daughters into trading sex for food in the slums (CNN)
  • More than 20,000 children are sex trafficked in Kenya (Human Trafficking)
  • 1500 women die in childbirth every day across Africa (WHO)

Reading these statistics is harrowing, but we can make a difference. Through Pure Charity, DaySpring’s (in)Courage has partnered with the Mercy House to fund 5 different phases needed to further the ministry – a van, generator, classroom, computer lab, and house . All 5 phases have been completed and the funding has been raised to purchase and furnish the new home and provide security for the girls and staff. But there are still needs. There is still prenatal care for the girls who will walk through the doors of Mercy House. There is still food to be bought and classes to be given. Will you join me this Christmas season and support this ministry? We may not be able to travel to Kenya, but we can support those who do. We can through our gifts, love the least of these. We can, through our gifts, hold these girls faces in our hands, look in their eyes, and tell them they have value. Let’s love on them and their babies this Christmas season.

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The Mercy House Shop is a place you can support the girls and their babies. This is an awesome way to get some Christmas shopping done, and make a difference in these girls lives. (All proceeds from product goes to Rehema House in Nairobi, Kenya. 25% goes to the girls for future use and 75% goes to current needs.)


Photographs courtesy of Mercy House Kenya. Photographer, Bess Brownlee

Act Justly. Love Mercy. Walk Humbly.











On Being Mentored

I’ve told you about my mentors, right? There are two ladies in my life that are currently making a difference through prayer and conversation. Can I tell you something else? I went into these mentoring relationships with a rather narrow view. At the beginning all I could see was my hurt and loneliness. God is opening my eyes to so much more. All I could think about was how these women could help me. How they would give advice, bestow wisdom and satisfy the yearning for relationship.

But something has happened in these past few months that I wasn’t expecting. I’ve discovered a few things about the mentoring relationship that is surprising and how it’s not one sided – its meant to build and encourage both women.

You see, these women have not just listened and allowed me to bear my heart burdens, they’ve also shared theirs. And  in doing this, they’ve allowed me to pray for them in ways that I would never been able to before.

I’ve also seen something interesting – we all struggle with something. And if they struggle with sin and heartaches and can still be an encouragement, does that mean that I, that you, can mentor others, too?

Sometimes I feel as if I’m not eligible to encourage/mentor anyone because I haven’t arrived. I have heart sins that are an ongoing battle. My words to my children aren’t always sweet or gracious. But if God can use these women in my life, can’t He use us, you and I, in the lives of others? We just have to be willing to be used, to be that woman who builds and encourages.

Being Enough

I’m headed to Allume in 4 short weeks. And, if you don’t know what Allume is, I highly recommend that you check it out. It is going to be AWESOME!  I’ve been slowly getting ready for it between all the crazy at our house and it is just now dawning on me – I have to meet new people and that scares me silly. Let’s just say I had a mini breakdown because I invited an online acquaintance to coffee.  I sat at the computer typing up my note and was suddenly transported back to grade school, “will you be friend” echoing  in my mind.

Right now I’m listening to Dara Mclean’s “Wanted“. And that song reminds me that even if no one answers ‘yes’ to my grade school question, the Father has named me as His own and that is enough.